Are your children excited to go back to school? Or are they afraid of being bullied? Here at Dragon Within, we take bullying seriously. We can help teach your child the respect, discipline, and confidence they need in school. 

Let me address what bullying is:

Bullying, in a nut shell, is a form of intimidation or domination toward someone who is perceived as being weaker.It’s almost like we are living in the jungle with a pack of wolves fighting over alfa male. We do all sorts of harmful acts to show our dominance and take what we want by force.  Typically as kids, the only thing we want is make the other child feel humiliated. Usually this is because we are insecure for some reason. There are different types of bullying. While some may think that bullying mainly consists only of physical domination, the fact of the matter is that there are verbal and emotional forms of bullying as well. And, with the rise of the Internet, there are now instances of children being bullied online through email, chatrooms and on Facebook. It is even possible to be bullied through text messaging on a cell phone. Chid bullying can happen in any of these forms. It’s not like in the 90’s when you had to go knock door to door to bully someone, now they make it easy for you.

For the most part, boys prefer to use physical intimidation tactics in their bullying. They will use physical aggression to force others to do what they want, or to feel in charge of a situation. Something about testosterone I would imagine. Girls, on the other hand, typically use more of a subtle approach. They stick to teasing, name calling, and passive aggressive methods. None the less it still hurts the same.

so how many ways can someone bully your child?

• Name-calling
• Teasing
• Pushing
• Hitting
• Threatening
• Spreading rumors
• Playing mean practical jokes
• Social exclusion
• and lets not forget our new favorites, SOCIAL MEDIA

So why do kids bully other kids?

They may be abused or neglected at home. They may not have parents that get involved in their life or well being. And how well do our school spread knowledge about bullying and taking a stand?

Let’s break down some numbers shall we?

• 60% of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying.
• 86% of students said, “other kids picking on them, making fun of them or bullying them” causes teenagers to turn to lethal violence in the schools.
• 282,000 students are physically attacked in secondary schools each month.
• Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people, resulting in about 4,400 deaths per year, according to the CDC. For every suicide among young people, there are at least 100 suicide attempts. Over 14 percent of high school students have considered suicide, and almost 7 percent have attempted it.
• Bully victims are between 2 to 9 times more likely to consider suicide than non-victims, according to studies by Yale University
• A study in Britain found that at least half of suicides among young people are related to bullying
• 10 to 14 year old girls may be at even higher risk for suicide, according to the study above
• According to statistics reported by ABC News, nearly 30 percent of students are either bullies or victims of bullying, and 160,000 kids stay home from school every day because of fear of bullying
• One third of teens reported being bullied while at school
• About 20 percent of teens had been made fun of by a bully, 18 percent of teens had rumors or gossip spread about them, 11 percent were physically bullied, such as being shoved, tripped, or spit on, 6 percent were threatened, 5 percent were excluded from activities they wanted to participate in, 4 percent were coerced into something they did not want to do, and 4 percent had their personal belongings destroyed by bullies
• 4 percent of teens in this study reported being the victims of cyber bullying
• Most bullying occurred inside the school, with smaller numbers of bullying incidents occurring outside on the school grounds, on the school bus, or on the way to school
• Only about a third of bully victims reported the bullying to someone at school
• About 2 of every 3 bully victims were bullied once or twice during the school year, 1 in 5 were bullied once or twice a month, and about 1 in 10 were bullied daily or several times a week
• In this study, females and white students reported the most incidents of being the victims of bullying
• 44 percent of middle schools reported bullying problems, compared to just over 20 percent of both elementary and high schools

Signs of child bullying

Are you like many other parents out there who are concerned for our children’s safety in school? There are many signs that indicate your child is a victim of bullying.

• Becoming withdrawn
• Showing fear when it is time to go to school
• Increasing signs of depression
• Decline in school performance
• Speaking of another child with fear
• Noticeable decline in how the child sees him or herself
• Signs of physical altercations, such as bruises, scrapes and other marks

Also try to be alert on if your child is the one doing the bullying at school:

• Views violence positively as the solution to most problems
• Shows aggression toward adults as well as other children
• Need to dominate others and control situations
• Easily frustrated
• Shows little sympathy to others who are being bullied, or who are having problems
• Won’t help stop bullying

If your child is the one being bullied, you need to help them as soon as possible. Don’t wait. Try talking to them.

1. Let them know that you can go together, to school authorities to see what can be done in terms of mediation, and in terms of increased attention paid on the school grounds.
2. Encourage the child to avoid the child bully, and seek help from a teacher or trusted adult when necessary.
3. Practice being assertive and asking the bully to leave the child alone.
4. Encourage your child to be with true friends – bullies are less likely to pick on children who are in a group.
5. take up a martial arts class to teach confidence, self discipline, respect, and much more.